“There are years that ask questions and years that answer,” from author Zora Neal Hurston, is suitable for the season we are in right now.

It was this time last year where we began to see our lives convert into what some may describe as the twilight zone. A pandemic emerged and engulfed our lives in a way many of us have only read about in riveting mystery novels.  For others, it just simply feels unreal. This has to be a movie of someone else’s life.  As the months passed with an uncharacteristic rhythm, we are still asking ourselves, when will it all end and what does normal really feel like to me?

At the end of last year, many advertisers, personalities, and promoters were jumping toward the New Year and encouraging us to take hold of this brand new year with hope of something better.  Their messages were “Don’t look back at 2020” and “the best view is from your rear view mirror.”

I am the first to agree and believe it best to press on towards the future and not look back.

In my humble opinion, this is really only true if we are truly honest with ourselves, query our experiences and brave enough to accept the answer. When I was faced with the challenge of caring for my Catherine in her early years, I often felt like I was in a perpetual twilight zone. It felt unreal then and, and sometimes even now, it still feels unreal.

I want to share with you five life changing questions I ask myself when I am challenged, upset, disappointed, afraid, or shocked:

1. What did you learn?
2. What did you learn about yourself?
3. What did you gain?
4. What did you lose?
5. What would you have done differently?

The timing of these questions is important. A year out from the start of COVID-19,  they serve as an important marker to help bring clarity to what I’m feeling.

You see, we can remember our lives before and we have lived through this experience long enough to bravely answer those questions. The outcome will not only transform you, but will give you a new baseline where you will certainly embrace the future and understand how to take hold of the year ahead.

I will share my answers in the weeks ahead and encourage you to share your experience with us. 2020 asked a lot of us and we owe it to ourselves to answer!